Resent

Resentment is evil. I’m not sure why but this time it’s bullied me and won. It’s a word that would’ve never been able to be used when describing me until recently and I’m not proud of it.

Once the optimistic, glass half full, happy person and now I struggle to think so positive. I’ve always been that person even when I went through some shit; shit that no one would have blamed me for becoming resentful about, I didn’t. I refused to allow room for resentment to come in, until now…

I resent that my self-esteem once so strong and undeterred is now so fragile.

I resent that I was once so comfortable in my own skin, yet now I’m questioning everything that was admired and loved about me.

I resent allowing to be drained emotionally and physically by giving all the effort for so long.

Most of all…I resent myself for loving someone else more than I loved myself because that is when the poison that is resentment slipped in.

XO -JC

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